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This article was written on 31 Mar 2009, and is filled under beverages, shit i want.

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Awesome Shit That I Want Tuesday

You like warm beverages. You like ink. You wish your morning venti double whip whip iced vanilla-caramel mochaccino could look more bad-ass.

I know I do. I’m always walking to work in the morning all, “This mochaccino is NOT projecting the image i wish to project. I want a mochaccino that says I WILL CUT YOU, MOTHERFUCKER yet also shows that I am environmentally sensitive and supportive of local artisans.”

That’s why you need this. Only $15, re-useable, keeps your fingers safe, AND you don’t have to commit to the permanence of getting your significant other’s name tattooed on your shoulder, because we all know that’s the death knell of a relationship and then you’ll have to get it covered over with some lame panther claw or get “Holly” changed to “Holla!” And it saves you from getting a “MOM” tattoo, because you know she doesn’t want you to get one anyway.

If you’re not the venti double whip whip iced vanila-caramel mochaccino type, there’s always this:

Now, even when my ink is covered up I can be BAD-ASS. For those who don’t want to drop a chunk of change to get an early American colonial gravestone motif tattooed on the back of your necks – just an example – we thank you, Etsy seller 60 Bugs, for this awesome yet painless and economical alternative.

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11 Comments

  1. burkie
    March 31, 2009

    awesome shit, indeed. i only wish they sold one that actually had “I WILL CUT YOU, MOTHERFUCKER” on it. i’d even pay $16 for that.

  2. Cyndi
    March 31, 2009

    Those are awesome! I could even make those! Too bad I don’t like hot drinks!!!!

  3. jodi
    March 31, 2009

    This is definitely awesome shit I want.

  4. Kay
    March 31, 2009

    I always thought I’d design one that said, “Don’t fuck with me; this is my first cup this morning.”

  5. My favorite Coffee Cup, I made myself, says…

    “Bitches Brew”

    It’s perfect! at least my kids say so!

  6. fuzzy
    April 1, 2009

    I’m gonna weigh in with the “I will cut you, Motherfucker” coffee-mug-crowd. This is a totally awesome mug, and people who make local artisan mugs everywhere should get off their lazy butts and make some.

    (one of my personal goals in life, which has been successful to date, is never to get stabbed).

  7. lisaiscooking
    April 1, 2009

    I’m a big fan of reusable coffee sleeves. I attempt to convert others regularly at coffee shops. The tat motif is fantastic.

  8. michelle
    April 1, 2009

    burkie, have you used etsy before? i get if you convo’d the guy, he’d totally make you a custom one. and it would RAWK.

    cyndi, hey, you could use them for cold drinks too. no more hands covered in icy cold condensation.

    jodi, yup, i can stop some awesome shit from a mile away. also, when are you coming over? i feel like i haven’t seen you in a million years.

    kay, again i say: talk to the dude.

    dana, well played.

    fuzzy, you gotta have goals. way to set the bar high with that one. (although, i don’t know where you live, so that may be a tougher goal than one would imagine).

    lisa, i actually don’t drink coffee/tea outside my home or office very much, so i haven’t had need for a reusable sleeve. but know i’ve bought this one, so there goes that. it would go great with i am not a paper cup,

  9. leena!
    April 1, 2009

    This makes me want to be your friend. But instead of a mocchachino that says “I’ll Cut You, Motherfucker”, I’m really more of a chai tea gal, a chai that says “Bitch, I’ma Kill You” while hinting of my tendency for flexitarianism and my love of animals. Maybe I can iron on a koala applique.

  10. Tracy
    April 1, 2009

    Those are so cool! I want one too!

  11. michelle
    April 2, 2009

    leena, wait, you didn’t already want to be my friend?

    i, too, am a chai fan, but i would want my chai cozy to say “i pity the fool who don’t like no chai.”

    tracy, so get one! they’re 15 dollars! go now!

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